Monday, December 1, 2008

how hard is it?

How is it that I can be completely enraptured by "In Style" and which jeans suit my shape (or lack there of). Why am I ravneous over an online site delving into the all important matter of how Robert Pattinson is handling his new found fame and demi-god status? Why am I so consistently devoted to the time suck that is all things Facebook (enough said...if you FB, you know exactly what I mean)?

But I can't seem to focus for more than five minutes on something, anything that might nurture my soul?

Would it kill me to pick up the Good Book and just read a passage? How hard is it to find my old copy of "My Utmost for his Highest" and open to today's date? Or better yet, would it kill me to sit still for even 3 minutes to know, simply know he is God?

Why is it so hard? Why do I treat it like a dentist appointment or like that trip to the grocery store that will take so long you fear it will suck the life right out of you?

I don't know, and I hate to admit how hard it is for me... I want to know Him more. I want my life to be a reflection of His. I want a heart that hurts for what hurts His; and loves what He loves. Yet I know if I depend on myself and don't carve out that precious time for some "soul feeding," I will (to borrow a wise friend's quote) drift south!

We all drift south when left to our own devices. Just like the teeth that have gone thru orthodontia and are immaculate, perfect, lined up just so...but lo and behold...someone doesn't wear their retainer and within weeks the teeth are out of line again---they have drifted south. The principal is proven everyday in life and nature. I prove it everyday.

How hard is it to sit at His feet and say, "I am here. I offer it all to you---the good, the bad, the ugly. Take me and use me..." It's isn't hard really, and when He meets you there, which He does everytime time, there is nothing like it. Which begs the question, why do I make it so hard???

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