Wednesday, February 13, 2013

I Could Win the Gold Medal...

It is comical how NOT competitive I am.  I could seriously care less if I lose at Scrabble or a game of basketball in our driveway.  I just simply don't have that edge in me and I don't think I ever have.  Competitive, no.  COMPARATIVE...oh yes.

I can compare with the best of them.  In fact, I could win a gold medal in it if comparing were a sport.   I compare myself to all other mothers, who seem to have magically figured out how to do everything right.  I compare myself to other wives, who I believe have it all together and embody Proverbs 31 with such ease.  I compare myself with others who do my same job at some other church, and I wonder when my church will pick up on what an amateur I am and cut me lose.

Comparison is the wrecking ball to my confidence, joy and contentment. It is probably one of the most damaging things we do to ourselves, and because we do it secretly and privately, I think it is even more caustic.  That which isn't brought into the light of day, seems to gain power and momentum I think.

2 things to ponder about comparison...

1)  As Andy Stanley says, there is no win in comparison.  I either beat myself up OR I degrade another in order to decide I've one up-ed them.  Neither honors God or the other person, and neither is worth my time.

2)   Comparison is so super destructive to our confidence because we, "compare our behind the scenes to everyone else's highlight reel (Steven Furtick)." Isn't this so true?  I idealize you, and then compare the real, behind-the-scenes me to that.  ...let the wrecking ball fly!

Can comparison lose its power if we simply bring it into the Light, boldly calling it out and showing it for what it is?  Can I break my habit of comparing, by admitting to a friend when I am struggling with it, instead of sitting with it in silence and solitude, letting it grow in ugliness?  Is it worth offering my comparative nature up to a Savior who is not unsympathetic, but actually understands when we struggle? Hebrews 4:15

Yes. Yes. and Yes.

Thursday, January 31, 2013

Friends Are the New Crystal Ball

"Show me your friends and I'll show you your future."

I heard this again recently and remembered that I love it and I believe it.  As a girl, who with 100%  certainly, knows that my high school friends saved my life by showing me to the Grace-Giver, this quote is way more than just a quote.  I am very literally living the life I have, because I had some pretty awesome friends who helped shape my future.

Upon hearing this quote, one immediately files the take-away into their mental rolodex of smart things to do: choose your friends wisely. Check.  

But what if we look at this on the flip side?  What if we realize that the role of being someone else's friend is monumental?  What if we comprehend that when we are a friend to someone, we become one of their "future shapers?"  

Suddenly the concept of friendship is way more and way bigger.  Suddenly friendship is a true responsibility.  It becomes something you fight for and cling to.  Allowing the slow fade when things get rough is no longer an option.  Running for the hills when the grit of real life replaces the unicorns and rainbows, doesn't cross your mind.  As a future shaper, friendship means being willing to pray hard and fight hard to see God's best become a reality in someone else's life.

"Show me your friends and I'll show you your future."

May we be the kind of friend who always has the future on our radar.  



Monday, January 21, 2013

That Time I Was Known as Legatron

(As I type I feel fearful.  It has been over a year since I last posted.  I make no excuses.  Can only say you shouldn't blog just for the sake of blogging.  And for awhile there, that's what it would have been about for me.  We'll see where this goes...)

I got a new nickname this past year.  I had to wear a walking boot for a long while after a reconstructive foot surgery, and I became known as Legatron.

The boot and nickname were cool (for about 2 days) but the surgery really wasn't.  It hurt far worse than I imagined.  It took way longer to heal than I dreamed (still healing 5 months later).  It was way more difficult to be incapacitated than I could have known it would be.

I had to go in every week and get my oh so tender foot tightly taped up with athletic tape.  Did I mention it was tight?  The doc essentially made a binder around my foot so that it would heal up correctly, but it made it hurt anew each Tuesday.  Needless to say, I dreaded Tuesdays.  But I got through it, and over time, the pain became more bearable and less on the forefront of every thought.  I had to bear in mind at all times, that in the pain, healing was happening.  In the pain, my bones were reshaping and re-molding, so they could be strong again.

So in light of the pain, and in light of knowing what I know now, would I do it again? 

It's a good question and I have actually pondered it a lot, especially knowing I need to same procedure on the other foot!

But, yes, my answer is yes.  Despite the pain of it all, I know having a healed, functioning-like-it-should foot will be worth it.

Life is like that, don't you think?

Brokenness (of foot, of spirit, of relationship, of name it) hurts.  When brokenness enters the picture, it takes longer to heal than we imagine.  It hurts beyond our presuppositions.  It is excruciatingly difficult to be incapacitated.  The process simply takes it out of us.

But at the end of it, it is worth it.  On the other side of brokenness can be healing and wholeness.  On the other side of it, there can be a new way.  On the other side of it, we can flourish and function like we didn't before.  But the only way to the other side, is through the pain, ruthlessly trusting the Healer to do what it takes to get us there.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
~ Psalm 147:3

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Birthday Musings

I turned 38 a couple of weeks ago. Seems like on my past couple of birthdays I have blogged reflections from the past year. So here goes again:

I have a 10 year old. This freaks me out. There is something about that very age that isn't tiny little boy anymore. It's more like almost middle-schooler, burgeoning on teen. The thought of being a mom to a teen freaks me out even more.

When you need a new couch but can't really afford one, buying a few new frames and accessories at Hobby Lobby for 50% off, totally carries you through.

Uggs (or in my case, Airwalk knock offs) are ugly, but can't be beat for comfort and warmth.

Attitude is everything. And attitude is closely tied into perspective.

Food is mostly about smell and taste, yet television has managed to make stellar shows about food, even though you can't smell or taste a thing. Long live Top Chef and Chopped!

God truly is Provider. Since we jumped off the proverbial cliff, my husband and I are living proof if it daily.

My laugh lines are deeper and certainly reveal my age. Somedays I hate them, but everyday, I am thankful I have had a lot of reasons to smile.

One of life's greatest mysteries, at least to me, remains the fact that when Aussies and British people sing, they magically drop their accents???

We adopted a dog, and I instantly turned into one of "those people." I bore people at work with stories about Sophie (as if she were my third human child), and suddenly doggie discipline tips and special treat recipes are of paramount importance.

Pinterest had legitimately made me a better cook, thus validating it's usefulness, even if it is a time suck. Wonder if my other favorite time suck, Facebook, made me a better anything? Seriously doubtful.

In my head I sing like my friend Corie. This is enough for me.

I am so thankful for my hubs. He makes my life easier. He makes my life fun. He makes me feel like the prettiest, most special girl anywhere.

And finally...

I belong to a Redeemer. He redeems everything... from my best efforts to my worst, from my pretty to my ugly, from my winsome to my treacherous. He is in the business of redemption and I have to believe NOTHING is beyond His redemption power. Nothing.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Abiding Woman

I found this be so inspiring and so true. I am sad that I often fall into the column on the left. I aspire to abide...

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